I still miss Ashley. Not a day goes by that I don't think about her. There's still this hole in my heart her smile and laugh and sassy ways used to fill. My brain knows that she's in a better place--no longer suffering, probably smiling that same mischievous smile--but my heart still wants her with us.
The void the death of a loved one leaves is never truly filled. Christmas just isn't the same without my grandmother giving me pajamas or a crochet scarf. I still get a lump in my throat when I look at pictures of my friend Elizabeth who died our senior year in high school. My Uncle Bernie, Prince, Mrs. Flame. They all had a part in making me who I am, and I wish I had one more chance to let each of them know how much they mean to me.
So today I mourn. But tomorrow I live.